Goodbye My Father
by otakuconfesses
Summary: This is a short babe story. deals with death, cancer and grieving. Not a happy story
1. Chapter 1

a/n: This story won't be long. I felt like this was a good way to work through my experience with my father's passing. The events are loosely based on what happened to my father during his fight with cancer. To make it work for me, grandma Mazur has also passed away. (sorry.)

Disclaimer: All recognizable characters belong to Janet Evanovich. mistakes are mine.

Goodbye my Father

I woke to the ringing of my phone. I glanced at the caller ID to see my mother's telephone number flash on the screen. My stomach tied itself in knots when I answered. "Hello?"

"Stephanie I need you to come pick me up, I got a call from the hospital and your father isn't doing well. They want us to come as quickly as possible." My mother's voice sounded strained, like she was choking back tears.

"I'll be there soon." I jumped out of bed threw up my hair, changed out of my pyjama and was out the door in less than 10 minutes. 15 minutes later I had my mother in the car and we were on our way to St. Francis.

Over the last 18 months my father has been fighting cancer; it started with stomach cancer. One day I noticed my father not eating a much as he normally did and was complaining about acid reflux a lot more. After some persuading I got him to agree to go to the doctors.

After many tests we found out it was stomach cancer. Within a few short months he had his first major surgery to remove the tumor. His entire stomach and half of his esophagus was removed, and then rebuilt from his intestines. The grueling 16 hours surgery was trying, and touch-and-go. Everyone was relieved when he made it through.

The celebration though was short lived when he was placed into a medical coma a couple of days later to treat his pneumonia. After watching my father sleep for 5 days, I was thrilled when he was awake again.

3 weeks later though he was back under the knife to try and stop the lymphatic leakage from the first surgery. By the time he was out of the hospital my nerves were fried.

Thanks to Ranger my family never saw a medical bill. Rumor has it the money came out of his own pocket. He made sure that my dad got the best palliative care that money could buy. He had also been my rock through this whole ordeal. After the failed chemo run and the announcement that the cancer had turned terminal, just a few weeks ago, Ranger stepped up more than Joe ever could. He would sit and talk with me, he would hold me as I cried and take my punches when I was mad.

As we arrived to the hospital I could feel something was wrong. We made our way to the ward and a nurse was waiting. The grim set to her mouth allowed me to guess what was going to come out of her mouth next.

"I'm so sorry, but Mr. Plum passed away at 9:20 am; shortly after I called you."

I felt numb. I held my mother as we walked up his room. He looked peaceful like he was sleeping. We talked with him, we told him we'd miss him, and we let our tears fall unabashed by how we may look.

By 11 we stepped out of the room into the hall just as Valerie arrived. I walked over to her and broke the news. She didn't believe me until I walked her to the room and allowed her to have some alone time with him. I don't remember much what happened that morning beyond hold his hand.

As we all left the hospital after the necessary paperwork was filled out I remembered that I needed to get my mom home. I agreed with Val that I would stay with mom for the next week. I climbed behind the well and I somehow managed to get back to my mother's place.

I sent a quick message to Ranger. 'My father died this morning. I managed to get my mother home but I'm going to need a lift back to my place to get some things.'

I was expecting the standard 'baby' come across the screen but he surprised me with an actual message 'I'll be there in 5.'

Sure enough, five minutes later Ranger knocked on the door. Mom opened the door and smiled that soft sad smile that seemed to cross her face when she looked at other people. "Thank you so much for coming to pick up Stephanie."

I grabbed my messenger bag and turned around to see Ranger engulfing my mother in a hug. I could barely hear him murmur "I'm sorry for your lose." My mother, who until recently, was terrified of Ranger hugged him tightly.

My mom and Ranger talked briefly before I was whisked away in his Porsche. I looked over as he slipped behind the wheel. "I thought you were in meetings all day. I was expecting one of the guys." I smiled softly.

Comforting hand was placed on my knee and he simply said "I left Tank to take care of the meeting. He understood."

Tank was like the big brother I never had, and I doubted that he would give Ranger much grief about this. Normally the car ride back to my place is quiet and not much was ever said, but today the silence held a certain solemn feeling. Grieving my father's lost wasn't just mine alone, but Ranger also affected this time. Over the last few months my dad and he has gotten very close, and I could only imagine what was going on in his brain right now.

We stopped and I smile looked sadly up at my window. Getting out and crossing the parking lot, I felt myself choke back tears as we made our way up into my apartment. Everybody tells you that it's okay to feel sad; it's okay to feel mad when you find out when someone's passed away. Though, I just couldn't conjure those emotions. I felt completely lost; I had spent all my anger on the cancer, I my sadness was used up over the last few weeks. It feels like I stepped 18 months down the line into my grieving processes. It felt almost like I had grieved while he was still alive.

Ranger let me into my apartment and I just looked around. It was a mess. I hadn't really had my head on straight over the last few months. I saw a Ranger smile his small smile and I snap "don't even say anything." I went to my room and started packing what I needed.

I grabbed what little fresh food I had to bring to my mom's. It only took me half an hour to get everything ready. I walked back into my bedroom did a quick cursory look and stepped out after making sure I have everything I need. I was enveloped by one of Rangers hugs. He pulled me close and petted my hair. "Everything will be ok." He murmured and kissed the top of my head. I nearly believed him, I felt safe in Rangers arms. He made everything feel better but it didn't change the fact has lost my dad.

After a few minutes I pulled away slightly and looked up at him. I smile softly. "Thank you." He kissed my lips so softly that a few tears leaked from the corner of my eyes.

He lightly brushed my tears away without saying anything. He picked up a my bags, I grabbed Rex, and we made our way back to the car.

I fell silent as I stood next to the car. Part of me wanted Joe to be the one with me right now but I knew that he had made his choice. Ranger dropped an arm across my shoulders and stood there silently until I was ready to move.

I turned towards him and hugged him tightly, burying my face into his chest. I struggled to keep all of my emotions I check. I knew that the entire burg would know that my father had passed away by now. That didn't mean however that I wanted to have a conversation about it in my parking lot. Ranger held me gently and didn't say a word.

I don't know if his mother taught him how to act around people but someone did a hell of a job. He seemed to know what to do every step of the way. I don't know if I would have made it through the last 18 months with out him. He has been my rock, my boss and my partner through this entire ideal and he has never wavered through this entire time.

I finally felt a gentle lift as my feet lifted from the ground. I hadn't notice a rangeman SUV pulled up beside us until I was sitting in the back in on Ranger's lap. I tilted my he'd to the side to look in front. I could see Lester driving and briefly wondered, "Whose driving the Porsche?"

Ranger looked down at me "Cal."

All of a sudden I burst out laughing at the thought of Cal squishing into the Porsche made my day. All the men came in carrying things and each one left with a hug leaving only Ranger and standing in the living room.

"I'll have Ella pass by later with some food.I've already cleared it with your mother." he kissed my cheek and left the house. Suddenly it was way to quiet.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimers : All familiar characters are Janet's mistakes are mine.

Chapter 2

Because Ranger had ordered the food, when Ella showed up I automatically assumed supper would be salad or something healthy, but in this box of heaven was a deep dish all dress, greasy Pizza. I don't think I ever loved him as much as I did right now.

My mom smiled and grabbed a piece while we stood in the kitchen, eating over the pizza box. It just didn't feel right eating at the table tonight; having my father just passing away this morning and Grandma only two years ago. Our lives seem to be have been thrown for a loop recently.

The silence seemed to be deafening with in the house. It was quiet with no TV, no useless chattering, no clanking of the dishes. Instead, there was just me and my mom standing, eating and trying not to cry.

Mary Lou came over that evening and believe it or not I smiled, I laughed and I was forced to reminisce. My mom, Mary Lou and I didn't discuss his passing, and we didn't talk about the future. We were just living in the past and trying to get back what little of the happy feelings we could get.

I made sure that Mary Lou got home safe and, after having woken up in such a rush this morning, I finally felt my energy drained from my body. My mom and I went to the motions of getting ready for bed. And I, at least, fell into a ref restless slumber. The next morning I woke up nice, bright and early, and felt just as tired as I did the night before.

I made my way downstairs to find my mom and Ranger talking over the counter. Ranger had a cup of coffee in his hand and as soon as he saw me he smiled. "Morning, Babe." He offered the mug to me.

I took the coffee from him and smiled up at him. "I know you have meetings all today, this is a Monday. There's no way that Tank going to let you out of this one."

"Actually…" He looked down at me. "Tank told me to not come into the office. He said I have more important things to do rather than sit at the office and pretend to work. I was too worried about you."

My heart swelled a little bit, Ranger just admitted to worrying about me and Tank knew us well enough to know that we need to be together right now. I slipped next to him, put my arm around his waist and continued sipping my coffee. He dropped his arm across my shoulders and hugs me softly. My mom sat on the other side of the island, smiling into her own cup, not having said a word yet.

"Ranger is going to be staying here on the couch for the next little while. He insists, also he insists that Ella brings over the food because he has special dietary requirements." My mom mentioned softly.

I snorted back a laugh. "You mean, you're forcing Ella to bring your tree bark here. Right now, I just want a massive submarine and the greasiest chicken from cluck-in-a-bucket. I don't want to eat salads."

He smiled at me and shook his head. "That stuff will kill you babe, but I'll let it slide for a week. Also, I told Ella to bring over her chocolate cake." He kissed my temple only in this head of mine.

This morning I felt a little better than yesterday but I had to force to keep tears in when I looked to my father's chair. That morning was filled with me calling the Funeral Home and getting paperwork signed for the body to be picked up. Mom and I went while Ranger worked on his laptop at home.

My father had left very strict instructions he wanted to be cremated, he did not want a viewing, and he didn't want a ceremony. He wanted just the family to be in attendance and he wanted to be buried in the plum family plot. Two years ago my mother would have said "oh but that would be a disgrace. We need to have a viewing we need to have the big ceremony" but now she's calmed down and went along with my dad wanted.

We got back to the house and my mother went to my father sick room. She just started taking everything apart. She moved things, made phone calls and made sure that everything would be out of the house. She turned to me and stated simply "Certain things just make me sick and make my heart hurt and the sick room is one of them. I'm going to get rid of everything that hurts and just keep it all of the things of his that make me smile."

I hugged her tightly. "I understand, but you're not getting rid of his chair." She hugged back and we had that rare moment. I looked up to see Ranger and smiled. I knew that I was going to be ok.


	3. Epilogue

Epilogue

It's been nearly 2 years since my father's death, and life has evened out again. Though the wound was still there, it didn't bother me as much. Valerie has moved back in with my mother, and is even going back to school. I don't know how with the truck load of kids she has.

I've changed employments permanently, Rangeman is my new home. It took Ranger working on me for a few months before I finally agreed to working solely for him. I have never been happier with a decision. Well, ok, maybe moving into Ranger's apartment was the best decision. It's hard to tell most days because Ranger was always by my side.

This morning wasn't any different then most, but when I walked by one of the many pictures I've put up around the apartment, I stopped. It was a picture of my father and me together, near the end of his life. We were laughing and having fun. I picked it up and stood there for a long while. Memories played through my mind of the good times and the hard times. I was suddenly fighting back tears. I didn't even hear Ranger come up behind me.

"Babe." he said, and wrapped his arms around my shoulders in a hug.

"Morning." I said, trying to sound happy, but I knew I failed. These little episodes weren't as often as they once were, but they hadn't gone away completely. Ranger knew better than to mention anything.

"Sept 20th is coming up soon, I've made sure you have the day off. Spend it with your family and go visit your father." He kissed my forehead and I thought about it.

"That wouldn't be a bad idea. I think I will. Do you work that day?" I half hoped that he did, but he worked 80 hours a week and, except when Tank forced him out of the office, he never took time off.

"No, I took it of as well. Just in case." He smiled down at me. This made me smile ear to ear. This man really knew what I needed, and that was his silent support.

"That sounds perfect." I put the photo down and pulled out of his arms. "By the way my mother invited you over for supper today. What do I tell her?"

Ranger thought for a second, "I have meetings until 6 but I can make it over for 6:30."

I went onto my toes and kissed his cheek. "Sounds wonderful."

My life might have changed, and my family might be a little different than the typical family. We have been with each other through thick and thin over the last few years. Even though that was the case, I wouldn't change it for the world. My life is perfect just the way it is.


End file.
